I’ve almost had it, People!
Time to quit, again.
Time to get back down to the baseline.
Maybe if I write it out it will happen. Sometimes getting things down on paper is magic like that. I’m exhausted from what I am doing to my brain and my body. I act like it’s not a big deal and I don’t talk about it like I should talk about it but here it is. It's not that big of a thing but it’s starting to feel like it.
My coffee consumption is insane. I am drinking about ten cups a day. It doesn’t have the same effect on me as it did. I can now drink coffee an hour before I go to bed and still sleep. My nicotine lozenge consumption is nuts-- all day, almost all the time. I chase one with the other - coffee, lozenge - to find balance. When neither are working I use sugar. Its amazing what the addictive brain will do. I’ve found a nice little triad to spin around in all day long. Obviously those who have been listening a long time have been through this shit with me before. My stomach hurts. I’m almost always nauseous. I wake up groggy. It’s fucking ridiculous. I’ve been exercising so now I want to get my mind and inside my body in shape. I’m not sure when I am going to pull the rug out from under myself but I am thinking about it. A lot. I feel gross and I know I am in an addictive cycle that just won’t go away. I have to make it happen. All those dumb negotiations with myself around these various less destructive substances have to stop. So, I will make it happen. Not today, of course, but soon. Yeah, tomorrow. Shit. I don’t know if I can do it tomorrow either. You get where I am at.
In other health news, I’ve decided that the issue at my office is more than just about a buzz in my stereo. I’ve been doing some poking around and it seems that working literally inside a cell tower may be bad for you. Like, for your brain. So, I want it off the building in which I work. Given that AT&T cant seem to stop the horrendous frequency that is pounding into my equipment I imagine the levels of waves pounding into my person must be beyond acceptable. And who decides what levels are acceptable and provided the testing for said levels? I’m assuming AT&T. So, not really impartial. If anyone knows anything about testing levels of RF and other waves that are emitted from multi-platform cell towers please let me know. I really want someone to test my space.
Great shows this week. Today I talk to the amazing George C. Wolfe about his career in producing, directing and writing theater. I also talk to Daniel Nazer from the EFF about the status of the ongoing patent troll issue and why podcasters should still be concerned. On Thursday graphic novelist and comic book artist Daniel Clowes and I talk about creativity, comics, inspiration, etc. You know what I do. It’s a good one. Also on Thursday I talk a bit to Ezra Edelman about his new documentary, OJ: Made In America.