It’s almost over, People!
The second season of my TV show ‘Maron’ is now available for your viewing pleasure on Netflix. I believe it is only in the US for now. I will let you know when and where it will turn up next, when I know.
As we head into the new year I am not reflecting on this last one. They all run together. I don’t seem to have a sense of delineation except vaguely through people I was with at this time last year or any of the years behind me. I can gauge the evolution of my emotional state by recollecting a screaming me at another time. I can report that my anger has eased a bit. It is in me but it is old and tired because it never got what it wanted or needed almost fifty years ago. I’m in negotiations with my anger. It has agreed to ease if I grieve what I missed and lost only as much as I can handle. So, no time line, just agreed to feel the sadness when it comes for as long as I can handle it at any given moment. It is a finite quantity. It is not bottomless. I am not committed to sadness or anger. I’m just now processing it. It comes in waves. Once the nicotine was removed that was really the last damper, the last filter, the last warm prize, the final sublimater. It’s a bit raw now but I am staying on the bull and it is slowing down. I guess today is metaphor day.
I don’t really know what to do to replace the mental food that was nicotine. I’m doing okay. No cravings, really. Just the angry residue of a deep, old habit dug into my neural pathways. I’ve been running, hard, up hills, for miles. It’s not as good but I like that I am building up endurance. It’s good to be able to run for a while. Just in case you really need to run for a while.
I went to Desert Hot Springs with the painter over Christmas. It was an amazing way to spend a holiday that really didn’t factor into our lives. I got her some cool rocks and a brass Ganesh and she got me some drinking glasses and an airpop popper and a Nehru jacket and a Terry Reid record. We just had a quiet time up at The Sagewater Spa. We brought a bunch of food and books and movies and hung out. We went to Joshua Tree for a couple of hikes and we co-existed without fighting. I would go as far to say that we had a good time. I can admit that. We had an awesome time.
On Monday I battle it out with Jason Nash. He’s a comic I’ve known for years and I have had an issue with for years. Maybe it’s just in my mind. We’ll find out. On Thursday I talk to the amazing Melanie Lynskey about her movies and life. Love her. Good week.
Happy New Year!
It’s almost over, People!