I was sorry to hear about the passing of a former guest, amazing writer and friend, Marc Spitz. I was just texting with him last week about Ryan Adams. It’s very sad. He was 47. I have no idea what happened. We will repost his episode to honor his memory.
I’m still out in the middle of the ocean. I’m trying to relax a bit. It’s very difficult because I have a phone. I wish smart phones were smarter, more intuitive. If you open your browser or platform or email it can sense your emotional and psychological state and deny you access with screens like, ‘Maybe give it an hour,’ ‘its not a good time to see this,’ or ‘okay, that’s enough.’
Where I am is one of the most beautiful places in the world. The few vacations I have taken in my life I have come here. I have mental problems. I guess some of you know that. They are not debilitating but it can get close sometimes. When I isolate myself and surround myself with water and beauty and I’m with the person I love you would think that would be perfect and relaxing. But if I turn off the noise around me, the best I can, the noise inside me amplifies. It has always done this. Despite the current situation in the world I look back and I can remember dozens of times when I should have found some peace and quiet and could have been present for some real beauty and openness but my brain just filibustered it with fear and panic for mostly fabricated reasons, narcissistic spiraling, a gift from my father. Though the reasons are now very real the pressure to find a way through just to cope is intense and pressing. Working on it. Experimenting with the spiritual but that drifts immediately into the mystical and burns up into a hodgepodge of mythical and possible battles that can slip into slight psychosis.
The fish is so fresh here. I’ve had amazing poke.
I’ll be back in the world soon.
Today I talk to actor Bill Paxton, who I love. Great guy, intense, amazing energy and good talk. On Thursday I talk to Sex Pistols guitarist Steve Jones about the life. Great talk.