What the fuck is a funnel cloud?

Hello, people of the list-

Let's plug. LA area shows! This week there is a live WTF at the Trepany House (formerly The Steve Allen Theater). It will feature the comedy of Rory Scovel, Ron Funches, Retta, Brent Weinbach, Eddie Pepitone and Jim Earl! On Thursday, March 29th, please come down to The Ice House in Pasadena and see me, Maria Bamford and Eddie Pepitone churn it up. It’s a great room.

Denver! I’ll be at The Comedy Works on April 6th & 7th. It’s a fucking awesome comedy room. Perfect, actually. Come down if you are in the Denver metro area or need to take a trip to Colorado.

Indiana, oh Indiana. I am writing this at the SOMA coffee shop in Bloomington. I had forgotten about the community of coffee shops in college towns. The local heroes of the mind sitting around doing the big work of being them - fixtures, freaks, for generations of students who come and go and may remember them as that guy who used to hang out the coffee shop. You know the one with: the hair, the jacket, those shoes, that face, those tattoos, those teeth. You know, the one who talked to himself, set himself on fire that time, hit that guy, stole the tray of muffins, smoked inside, was writing that book on napkins, disappeared, I think. You know? That guy.

The weather is unseasonably warm and perfect. I was worried. I have had the date here booked for months and last night was a showdown between the Hoosiers and the Wildcats. It was a big deal given that basketball is the primary theater of belief in these parts (the Jesus thing is a close second). This game was so important that the city took down the lampposts so the possible angry or happy revelry wouldn’t include people falling out of the sky. Sadly, the event meant nothing to me. I’m not saying that in a condescending way but it really meant nothing to me other than the possibility of taking a hit in tickets sales. The place is already small. If I really think on it, I didn’t care about ticket sales either. I like a small crowd and/or a small club and/or both. That’s where you get the real work done and The Comedy Attic is one of the best clubs in the country.

What I didn’t count on was being woken up during a much needed nap. I had to get up at 3am. I was sleeping deep in my Marriot suite and woke up to a pounding on the door.

“Guest services!”

“Uh, what? I’m good.”

“Guest services.” I went to the door.

“What’s up?”

“There was a funnel cloud seen in the area. We are recommending that guests take shelter. If you want to stay in the room the bathroom is the safest place.”

“Okay, thanks.”

It seemed like a weird time to be polite or hide the truth. What the fuck is a funnel cloud? If there is a tornado coming, which there might be, call it a fucking tornado. I can sleep through a funnel cloud but a tornado I don’t think so. I went back to the bed and tried to sleep but the hail storm pounding against the window wouldn’t let me.

Basketball, Tornados and Hail? I thought, ‘Why is this happening to me?’

None if it affected the show last night. They were great. Thanks for coming out!

It seems to be Arrested Development week on WTF. On Monday Michael Cera hangs out in the garage and on Thursday Jeffrey Tambor and I joust in front of a live audience in Austin at SXSW.