I have work to do on myself.

The truth, people-

Hello. How are you? If you are in the Bay Area this week I will be at the Nourse Theater in conversation with Adam Savage from Mythbusters on Wednesday, October 16th. It’s a City Arts and Lectures event. Should be cool. I assume I will be sitting in a comfortable chair next to Adam, chatting. It’s always weird sitting in a big comfy chair next to someone in the same kind of chair and we’ll be the only things on stage. Two people, two chairs, cozy and isolated in a big space in front of people. Should be good.

I’m glad everyone is digging the new special, "Thinky Pain." As the days go by I become more proud of it. By the time I finished overseeing editing and waiting, I never wanted to watch it again . I don’t really need to. The positive response has been overwhelming. I think it’s the best standup work I’ve done. It looks like my life’s work. Every set I do feels that way. It becomes less about the material and more about the ongoing conversation of my life. So, more to be revealed as time goes on.

On the show this week, I'll fill you in a bit on what has been a couple of the most difficult weeks of my life. It’s weird to have the relationship with you that I do. I can’t keep things hidden because I would feel like I was being disingenuous or dishonest. I don’t think most entertainers have the same problem.

The reason that it has been awful is that my relationship with Jessica has ended. I ended it. We had big plans and hopes and it’s over and I am heartbroken and very sad. As you know I am not the easiest man to live with and we had a very lively and passionate and difficult relationship at times. We have been trying to make things work and move forward but it just became too hard and too toxic. It takes two to toxic. I love her very much and I care for her more than anyone I’ve ever been with and I couldn’t make it work. Ending a relationship with someone I still love and care about is the hardest thing I’ve ever done and there’s guilt, sadness, disappointment, heartache, loneliness and anger that I am dealing with and will deal with for a while. I know it was the right thing to do. I want her to be happy and have the life that she wants to have. It just can't be with me. She is a great person with a big heart. I have work to do on myself and I want to be happy as well. I just couldn’t do it in the relationship we had.

I’m not sure I’m cut out for relationships. I keep screwing them up. Maybe someday. Harry Nilsson has been helping me through it.

This week, I talk to Natasha Lyonne about one of the most harrowing drug phases I have ever heard or talked about on the show. The talk was recorded before the release and success of "Orange is the New Black." We talked just before it came out. I’m thrilled for her success and thankful that she shared her story with me. On Thursday I talk to the food critic, Simon Majumdar. I didn’t know what to expect. When I saw him on Iron Chef he always sort of annoyed me but I wanted to know what a food critic’s brain was like and it turns out he’s a sweet smart guy with a nice story. Hope you dig.

Thanks for being there for me.


Boomer lives!