So it goes, Folks!
Another two great live shows at the Vic in Chicago! The Vic is a great theater. It’s one of those old-timey theaters that feels like a big theater with its balconies but somehow is intimate. I taped my last special there and it was good to be back.
I love this city (I’m sitting at O’Hare as I write this). This traveling one night for a show is a bit hard on the mind in the way that it doesn’t feel like it really happened. It’s like a dream. I wake up in the middle of the night in Los Angeles, drive to LAX, fly half asleep to Chicago, do sound check, do shows, go to sleep, wake up in the middle of the night, drive to O’Hare and fly back to LA half asleep then drive home. That space between waking up in the middle of the night two days in a row is like a waking dream state. It’s odd. I do know that the shows were good and I was glad people came out. I’m just sad I didn’t have more time to spend in Chicago. I love this city. I did manage to stuff some Lou Malnati’s pizza into my face and it was glorious. It’s the little things (that are bad for you) that make life great.
I can’t wait to have some time off. I don’t know if I’m starting to feel my age or I’m just exhausted. Probably both. I’m a little achy and grumpy. I have a couple more weeks of shooting on GLOW and some tour dates in the spring. I’ll probably shoot another special in the late spring and that’s it. I’ll get a vacation in there at some point. Then it will just be the podcast and me for a while. I think about retiring constantly but then it passes. I barely know what to do with free time on the rare occasions I have it. I really can't imagine what I would do with nothing but free time, but that is the idea isn’t it-- to do nothing. I guess the idea is really to do those things that you love to do, but I do those anyway and I imagine if all I did was those things I would get bored of them pretty quickly and there’s only a few.
I’m just feeling the fragility of it all. The body, the balance between people, the world, the darkness at the core of all questions being answered at all times with no real way to determine if the answers are true or even knowing if the questions are ridiculous. They are the same basic questions since the beginning of questions. All you have to hold on to is whatever fine psychological and emotional infrastructure you have in place to insulate you from the darkness-- actions, some good deeds, being there for others, avoiding falling into yourself in a muted flurry of hopelessness or consumed in a swirl of futility. Pizza.
Sorry. I guess it's existential poetry morning here at O’Hare. People are bundled up. It’s cold. It’s grey outside. We are all in route.
Today I talk to Dana Carvey and it was very surprising because, again, I made assumptions and they were all wrong in a good way. On Thursday hallucinogenic traveler and comic Shane Mauss talks with me about tripping balls. Good talks.
So it goes, Folks!